Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Competitive Mommying Part 1

So after meeting a girlfriend for coffee today…I realized that competitive mommying, as I like to call it, starts in the womb. Its a little hard to tell which side, pre or post womb, is more competitive…but here is my take. For the in the womb mommy battles, there appears to be 3 main components:

1)Mommy weight gain in pounds: Nobody wants to gain the most. Everybody wants to be "all belly." Ok ok, so I am super duper guilty of this desire except the fact of the matter is I was the size of a small beluga whale. Yes, I somehow managed to gain 60lbs eating fruits and veggies with a cookie tossed in here and there. I try to blame the majority of the weight gain on bed rest this but we will never really know why I desired to look like a beached whale. I always thought that I would be this hip and chic pregnant girl glowing from head to toe, but who doesn't want to look like that?!?!

2)Size of supposed baby in belly: Ok, so while preggers I too wanted this humongo baby. I now ask myself what the heck was I thinking?!?! Who wants to birth a huge butterball turkey?!?!? Not me! So, if we are going to be honest here…I think I was secretly hoping for this HUGE baby so that there would be less weight to lose after the dude was born. Not my luck…our little senor was just a mere 6 lbs and 7 whole ounces! The doctor told us at least 8 lbs but they never really know for sure until the babe arrives. What was the point in gaining 60lbs for a 6 pound and some change baby???? I sure as heck don't know. As I was so deflated when they yelled out my little man's weight, I even asked if they were sure that there wasn't another one in there. Holy smokes…53.5lbs to lose after a c-section???? Oy Vay!

3)Infant trivia: Ok, so that may sound a little weird but for all you mommies and mommies-to-be …you know its true. It seems like everyone has done the most or best research on baby goods for their registry. But, lets face it…we all have different tastes and needs, thus we all seem to pick different items, but we all think what we have is the best and most definitely will tell you why. So it actually can be pretty funny watching new moms and moms-to-be critique baby registries. So while infant trivia is quite entertaining already, it does not seem to end there. It gets really funny when all these mommies…ok, ok, I know I am included here…get going on crib bumpers, co-sleeping, bottles, baby carriers, colic and it seriously could go on for decades. I think the funniest part about infant trivia is the back chatter after moms get together. The "i cant believe she thinks la la la.."Too funny!

Stay tuned for Part 2...

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